It’s me again.
I’m a totally different person than when I last wrote an article on here. It feels strange typing this out. My goals have changed, my outlook has changed, I’m a new Cullen.
But it’s a good change. I feel deeper in my relationship with God than I’ve ever been before. I feel such peace in where He is leading me and I am so excited about the plans that He has for my life. Not because I’ve had huge victory in my life over struggles or because I had a vision in my sleep, but because I’ve learned things about Jesus Christ.
There have been many things that have happened in my life lately that have been HUGE in teaching me and challenging me. For over a half year I have been dating a unique and wonderful woman, Melinda W. Where exactly God is leading this relationship I don’t know for sure, but I have already learned so much about love. What it looks like, and more importantly, the source. I have also been reading books that have expanded my view of God tremendously. Most of them by C.S. Lewis. The Screwtape Letters, Out of the silent planet, and Paralandra. Highly recommended.
With this heart change I have decided to discontinue NationPains. When I started writing in 2008, 4 years ago, I wanted a platform to prepare for ministry on. Something to keep me sharp and to learn from.
It’s time to take the training wheels off.
This is one of the last articles that I will be writing on here. The final article will be an announcement of my next move into ministry. Something very big and scary for a person like me.
Thank you for being awesome readers. Thank you for the comments (489 of them), subscriptions (280 of you), and everything else that encouraged me.
Please keep your email in the list for when I make the announcement.
-Cullen J Webb
I want to share with you a few songs that have been stirring my heart lately. I listen to them almost daily, and they haven’t gotten old yet.
- All Around Me – David Crowder
- We Proclaim Him – Times Square Church
- Lead Me – Sanctus Real (I actually just learned of this one a couple days ago. Thanks Paul.)
- Take Me As I Am – Lecrae
I haven’t forgotten about this blog. There are, however, things going on right now that have been consuming most of my time. I am desperate to get back to writing often, as I enjoy and benefit from it very much.
It’s easy to write about yourself (you don’t have to research), so I want to simply post about the past month or so of my life.
What have you been doing?
In no particular order:
- Preparing for and taking the GED
- Developing mobile applications
- Helping my brother renovate his home
- Ebay (’nuff said)
- Reading books:
a. Teaching to change lives
b. Mere Christianity
d. Dracula (I actually enjoyed it)
e. A few others that slip my mind
- In addition the the books above, I’m writing a review of “Love Wins” by Rob Bell
- David Wilkerson’s memorial service in New York
- A few more things that also slip my mind.
What do you plan on doing?
- College – Calvary Chapel – Read their Doctrinal Statements. It’s like a sermon.
- Work – God willing, a church or ministry. Although I’m too young to be closing any doors.
- Maintain certain hobbies – This blog, video editing, etc…
- Becoming a righteous and godly man, raising a godly family, doing godly things :)
I don’t think I’ve ever used a smiley before in a post…
Anyway. I want to state that this blog has been a huge source of my growth in recent years. It has enabled me to express myself, research various topics, and train my typing fingers to write clearly. Things that are going to be essential.
If you have made it this far you probably know more about me than I do. Thanks for being a reader.
My father is writing a blog now!
He asked me to build him one as a Christmas gift, and just now decided on the name.
Run over and check it out: http://www.RevivalsHeartbeat.com
We haven’t ironed out all the details yet, but the posts are on the way. Let us know what you think.
Just because I’m late doesn’t mean we can’t cut the virtual cake!
I am an official adult now. 18 years old. It is an odd thing having watched my Brother and Sister go through this before me.
Anyways, Happy birthday everyone!
Thanks for reading!
-Cullen Webb (The adult one)
Anyone else tired of watching the world go down hill?
I wish I knew what to do about it. I can post all day long about why it’s wrong, but God’s already done that. It’s called a conscience. So if man is able to ignore God, surely they are able to ignore me.
I know that in the end days evil will abound. But where is the Holy Spirit? Isn’t that supposed to be overflowing as well?
Perhaps I know why it hasn’t been overflowing in my life. Or this country. In my video, The Passion Promise, Paris Reidhead is quoted saying “…are you using God as an end or a means?” I, for one, have been using Him as a means to my own end. I’ve been so distant from Him, because He hasn’t been anything more to me than a way to fix my life or this country. Maybe a little more. But not enough.
Even writing this out, I noticed that I called the Holy Spirit an it. I don’t think He likes that.
I’ve even started to write sermons based upon what I think the people need, and not what God wants.
There are so many people in this world, myself included, who are capable of declaring war on sin, evil, and the flesh. But instead of using the immense power given to us by God we raise our white flags almost proudly declaring peace with a world that hates Christ. Not for God’s sake, obviously, but for our own selfish desires and ambition.
Who are we that we should even consider our own fate when there are thousands of souls, within and without the church, over whom the Lord weeps? They will spend an eternity in Hell because I wont spend a minute in surrender sharing the gospel. Shame on me. I deserve a fate worse than theirs.
Who are we that we think we have the right to a comfortable life? We rub the name of Jesus Christ in the mud. He denied comfort and chose instead the most gruesome way to die after living a most humble lifestyle. There are 159,000 Christian slain every year, and I distance myself from them.
Who are we to call ourselves Christians? We use the word so flippantly. I don’t have the right to the word any more than I could call myself a U.S. Marine.
Perhaps nobody does. At least I see that now.
Soldier in Training
I wanted to offer an explanation for my disappearance lately. Not an apology, mind you, because all of the reasons are good ones.
My family made the decision to sell our home and move back to the home-stead with our Grandma. This required two very difficult projects: 1) Prepare, list and sell our home. 2) Renovate the soon-to-be home.
We began on the second almost immediately. Spending most free weekdays driving an hour and a half to work on a 60-year old house. It has been rented by a wide variety of people, so it has seen more than most.
We then prepared our home. This took some work as well, as we are very good at stacking untold amounts of keep-sakes in places like our attic and garage. But with not a little elbow grease, we listed it for-sale-by-owner.
My mother has a knack for selling houses. It only took 2 weeks or so to get a serious offer. My Father accepted.
At this point in time we were not ready to move. The house we planned to move into was still a box with saw-dust inside. But both my parents thought they were being led to accept. So we did.
God is a creative guy, in case you haven’t been outside lately. He can make birds fly, fish breath underwater, and delay bank loans so families can renovate in time. It took over a month for the buyers loan to be approved. Which was both sweet and sour. We were fearful that it would not go through at all, and we were grateful that we were given extra time.
Now, the house is a beautiful country home that few would turn down. I love it. I want to post before and after pictures for all of you to see.
So now you have a glimpse of my schedule over the past few months. If you take the above and throw in softball, bible study, camp meeting, graduation, skate night, skeet shoot, trips to Canada, and various other things, you’ve nailed it right on the head.
So thanks a ton for your patience. I love to write, whether I’m good at it or not, so don’t think I don’t have plans for Nation Pains.
With tired fingers,
I am on the brink of graduation. And although I will be an adult by default, I do not feel in the least bit like a man.
I realize that this may be simply because I know so little about what it means to be a man. But I cannot help but feel as though I have fallen behind in where I am supposed to be. There is so much that I never considered about “growing up.” Responsibility has a lot more to it than “do and don’t do”, or feeding Spot the family dog.
I am overwhelmed by who I am, where I am going and who I should be. I wish there was a big red “surrender” button that I could press and give God absolute control over my every thought, action and motive. In this way would I know what to do. But God has left it up to us, and this scares the living daylights out of me.
There is no “do over,” no spell check, no second chances. I have but one life, and the weight of its value is something I cannot comprehend.
Good thing there’s a manual God gave us.
Well, here’s a video that is supposed to be about dating. But my Youth group has been going through it and it appears to be more about manhood.
God bless you,
Before I say anything, I want you to realize that this is the very first time my name has found its way into the title. Weird.
Anyways. I am very sorry for not writing on here for so long. It’s not that I don’t want to, or am unable to, but because my laptop is getting a tune up and I don’t know when I will get it back.
Oh, and while we are on that subject, don’t EVER interrupt a Windows update. Even if you have multiple programs running at the same time and your dad wants to use your laptop to write a sermon.
*cough*Good thing I didn’t do that. *cough*
I can’t wait to start writing again. Many good ideas.
Thanks for reading and putting up with a procrastinator like myself.
Some of you big-shot bloggers out there are probably laughing at that number. But I leap for joy, with a hearty laugh to go along with it.
I had no idea there were so many, I just got on to clean up some of the robot spam members, and then realized just how many people have signed up in the last few months.
I need to think of something to do in celebration with you guys. A virtual cake? Nah. But let me know if you think of anything.
P.S – Want to be #126?